“You need someone in your life who excites you, makes you nervous, and forces you to question what you think you already know. These usually come in the form of a crush or a relationship. A relationship is obviously ideal but a crush can tide you over like a nice appetizer. We spend so much of our time feeling jaded and set in our ideas, and that’s clearly not a fun way to exist. We pretend it is but deep down it feels a little miserable because we don’t want to know all the answers. We want someone who’s challenging, who we can’t figure out, and can tell us that we’re full of crap. We need someone to get us off the internet and remind us that real life is much more fun. And it’s okay to be unsure and nervous because that just means we’re alive again.”
Very aptly described a side of me that I can’t explicitly put into words. Now all of you readers know..
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NOT discarded,
You say,
They’re like ink pens and you’re like the ballpoint pen.
Their life span is shorter while yours is longer.
I say,
They’re like the drink and you’re like the cup.
They come and go, while you hold everything.
You’re my everything.
You say,
When I just got new pens, you’ll be left aside.
But when their life span has ended, you’ll still be the one.
I say,
When I just got the drink, I fill them into my cup.
Before I fill the drink, I look to see if the cup can fill the drink.
Before I look at them, I look at you.
You’ll always be the first priority, my first consideration.
Your handle keeps me away from the heat,
Your sides keep the drinks from overflowing.
You’re my guardian.
I say,
They’re not pens, they’re not drinks.
You’re not a pen, you’re not a cup.
Because all these are perishable.
I say,
You’re indispensable.
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Incoherent,
Is it fair, if I say, this pain for you and I, will be worthwhile, because this is my unconditional love for you?
I’m sorry.
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With you,
I never knew how hard it was to fight this battle. Constantly racing against the cruelty of time, constantly racing against people whom you know you’ll never meet on par with, constantly racing against self-doubts in this deceptive world.
I never knew it could be so tough. It’s like back to the trench that entraps you so deep you can’t seem to draw strength to climb out of it. I wish time would take mercy on me, I wish courage will knock on my weak little door, I wish I was really as tough as I appear to be.
But I know this road is much easier with you around. Thank you for always being there. I wish there was a way of expressing it that would make you feel how much I mean what I say, and how much I mean what I want to say. Everything just seems to calm down by millions just by looking at your silly faces that you’d never do for anyone else but me. I love how I know everything’s gonna be alright with just your stupidly warm smile. Whatever I’m pursuing now has no value if it’s not gonna be for you, and for us.
You could have chosen anyone, and I’m thankful it’s me.
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Take a little step back,
Haven’t been here for a long long time, can’t exactly recall when was the moment I could use words to soothe my emotions. Can’t exactly recall how liberating it felt to do so.
As expected, a term of university life has passed. Not going to harp on the “still remember those times…” here.
Everything is taking on full speed. Everyone is steering their paths to where they exactly want themselves to land.
Sometimes, I wish the world could just slow down for a moment. Then again, why aren’t I wishing for myself to move a little faster with the world?
Many times, I wish I knew who I really am, what I really want, where I really see myself to be. Then again, why are things just stopping at “wishing”?
I can’t deny I just want to take the easy way out – just want to finish this degree without any expectation, just want to get a stable job and income, just want to lead a simple life where I can come home happily to a family dinner and spend my evening time jogging or swimming my heart out, just want a group of unwavering and simple friends around me, just want to live a life where nothing is more complicated than the word itself.
I’m so tired.
Wish I could express myself better in words. Wish I was a better person.
Let me just be in sync with the world, for once.
Is someone out there feeling the same way?
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To me,
You’re one and only.
And more than enough.
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The simplicity in life,
“Julio Diaz has a daily routine. Every night, the 31-year-old social worker ends his hour-long subway commute to the Bronx one stop early, just so he can eat at his favorite diner.
But one night last month, as Diaz stepped off the No. 6 train and onto a nearly empty platform, his evening took an unexpected turn.
He was walking toward the stairs when a teenage boy approached and pulled out a knife.
“He wants my money, so I just gave him my wallet and told him, ‘Here you go,’” Diaz says.
As the teen began to walk away, Diaz told him, “Hey, wait a minute. You forgot something. If you’re going to be robbing people for the rest of the night, you might as well take my coat to keep you warm.”
The would-be robber looked at his would-be victim, “like what’s going on here?” Diaz says. “He asked me, ‘Why are you doing this?’”
Diaz replied: “If you’re willing to risk your freedom for a few dollars, then I guess you must really need the money. I mean, all I wanted to do was get dinner and if you really want to join me … hey, you’re more than welcome.
“You know, I just felt maybe he really needs help,” Diaz says.
Diaz says he and the teen went into the diner and sat in a booth.
“The manager comes by, the dishwashers come by, the waiters come by to say hi,” Diaz says. “The kid was like, ‘You know everybody here. Do you own this place?’”
“No, I just eat here a lot,” Diaz says he told the teen. “He says, ‘But you’re even nice to the dishwasher.’”
Diaz replied, “Well, haven’t you been taught you should be nice to everybody?”
“Yea, but I didn’t think people actually behaved that way,” the teen said.
Diaz asked him what he wanted out of life. “He just had almost a sad face,” Diaz says.
The teen couldn’t answer Diaz — or he didn’t want to.
When the bill arrived, Diaz told the teen, “Look, I guess you’re going to have to pay for this bill ‘cause you have my money and I can’t pay for this. So if you give me my wallet back, I’ll gladly treat you.”
The teen “didn’t even think about it” and returned the wallet, Diaz says. “I gave him $20 … I figure maybe it’ll help him. I don’t know.”
Diaz says he asked for something in return — the teen’s knife — “and he gave it to me.”
Afterward, when Diaz told his mother what happened, she said, “You’re the type of kid that if someone asked you for the time, you gave them your watch.”
“I figure, you know, if you treat people right, you can only hope that they treat you right. It’s as simple as it gets in this complicated world.””
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Protected: For your eyes only,
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Catch Ups,
Had a wonderful night after graduation ceremony with Lionel, Fab, Cheng Qi and Jia Le.. =) Just sitting by the reservoir.. Taking in the peacefulness.. Sharing all that came to our mind.. Pure bliss =) Shall do graduation ceremony another day in another post if I’m less lazy..
Had a wonderful night tonight too, just chilling and talking nonsense at the bar with Chiam, UncleJasonYeo, Weizun, Joyce and Lester after that Uncle Yeo turning dont know how many thousand rounds to find a parking slot.. Super ultimate niao ren all of them, had lotsa fun just laughing the night away =) We joined Sing Hong RB and Yuan Hui thereafter for some midnight KTV..
KUNGFU PANDA TOMORROW! NIGHT CYCLING!
Wa.. Life after graduation actually quite shiok hor? =)
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Life’s too short for regrets.
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